Introductions at Dinner

The host must always see that every gentleman either knows or is presented to the lady he is to "take in" to dinner, and also, if possible, to the one who is to sit at the other side of him. If the latter introduction is overlooked, people sitting next each other at table nearly always introduce themselves. A gentleman says, "How do you do, Mrs. Jones. I am Arthur Robinson." Or showing her his place card, "I have to introduce myself, this is my name." Or the lady says first, "I am Mrs. Hunter Jones." And the man answers, "How do you do, Mrs. Jones, my name is Titherington Smith."

It is not unusual, in New York, for those placed next each other to talk without introducing themselves—particularly if each can read the name of the other on the place cards.

Dress for Dinner

For an informal dinner a woman may wear a semi-evening dress of the sort suitable for afternoon while her partner wears the regular dinner jacket. For a formal affair formal decollete dress with the hair arranged somewhat more elaborately than usual is required. Jewels may be worn. Gloves are always removed, never at a dinner should they be tucked in at the wrists. Men, of course, wear full evening dress to a formal dinner.

In hotels and other public dining-rooms there is more freedom of choice as to what one shall wear but it is in bad taste to attire oneself conspicuously. A woman dining alone should always wear her hat into the dining-room even if she is a guest of the hotel.

It is amazing how much the little niceties of life have to do with making a dinner pleasant, and in every home the family should "dress for dinner" even though this may not mean donning regulation evening dress. Formal or informal, in the intimacy of the family circle or in a large group of friends the meal should be unhurried and calm.

Dinner Party: Do Not Experiment For Strangers

Typical dinner-party dishes are invariably the temptation no less than the downfall of ambitious ignorance. Never let an inexperienced cook attempt a new dish for company, no matter how attractive her description of it may sound. Try it yourself, or when you are having family or most intimate friends who will understand if it turns out all wrong that it is a "trial" dish. In fact, it is a very good idea to share the testing of it with some one who can help you in suggestions, if they are needed for its improvement.

Or supposing you have a cook who is rather poor on all dinner dishes, but makes delicious bread and cake and waffles and oyster stew and creamed chicken, or even hash! You can make a specialty of asking people to "supper." Suppers are necessarily informal, but there is no objection in that. Formal parties play a very small rôle anyway compared to informal ones. There are no end of people, and the smartest ones at that, who entertain only in the most informal possible way. Mrs. Oldname gives at most two formal dinners a year; her typical dinners and suppers are for eight.

Entertainment During the Party

Some hostesses like to provide special entertainment for their guests -- professional dancers, elocutionists, or singers. But here "circumstances must alter cases." As a matter of fact, not very much entertainment is really required, for if the guests are congenial, they will no doubt enjoy conversation among themselves. It is, of course, not necessary to limit one's conversation to the lady or gentleman with whom one's lot has been cast for the evening. However, special attention should be paid to that person.

Seating the Guests

The seating should be arranged by placing cards bearing the names of each guest next to each plate if the party is a large one. This method may be pursued if the party is small, though, in this case it is quite possible for the hostess to indicate gracefully the place where she wishes each guest to sit. The guests who enter the dining-room together sit side by side; the hostess always waits until everyone is seated, before she takes her place and motions that the dinner is to proceed.

Dinner Party: Equal Number of Men and Women

The hostess, in inviting her guests, should be sure that there is an equal number of men and women. Husbands and wives should never be sent into the dining-room together. The usual order of precedence is as follows: The host leads with the lady who is to sit at his right; if the dinner is in honor of a married couple, the host goes in to dinner with the wife of the honored guest; the hostess ending the "procession" with that lady's husband. When there are no guests of honor the host takes the eldest lady present. Usually a lady visiting the house for the first time is the first to enter the dining-room. If there is one more woman than men in the party, the customary thing is for the hostess to enter the dining-room alone after all her guests have entered it. She must never take the other arm of the last gentleman.

Finger Foods

Lobster claws may be pulled apart with the fingers. Shrimps also, when served whole in their shells, may be separated, peeled and eaten with the fingers. Fruits such as oranges, apples, grapes, peaches and plums are all eaten with the fingers. Celery, radishes and olives are similarly eaten. Sometimes there are other relishes on the dinner table, and the guest must use his common sense to determine whether they are eaten with the fork or fingers. Bonbons, of course, are always eaten with the fingers.

Whenever fruits are served the finger-bowl should follow. It is always used at the completion of the dinner. The bowl is half filled with tepid water and set upon a plate. A fragrant leaf may be added to the water. The fingers are dipped lightly into the bowl, one hand at a time, and then dried on the napkin. It is a mark of ill breeding to splash the water about, to put both hands into the bowl at once, or to wet the entire palm of the hand. Only the finger tips should touch the water.